diary of a teacher-wannabe

February 7. Tuesday.

Hi, I’m your Values Ed teacher, Teacher Xai is a sentence I didn’t think I’d ever say. 🙂

Today is the first day that I will pose as a Values Teacher. I’ll be taking over the first and last quarters of four classes in the next two months, eight Tuesdays. I don’t know how to feel about teaching respect and friendliness. All I know is that I would have to display these qualities before I go around campus talking about it. Integrity is the key to success. I don’t suppose I could fake it… Can I?

I have to be up before the sun rises to make it to my 7am class. It’s almost 3am and I haven’t slept. I shall set my alarm to 5am so I could at least catch a nap and not look like a zombie on my first day.


I was *almost* late! I was supposed to be at RMHS at 6:30 to get acquainted with the teachers, find my classrooms and attend the flag ceremony. I got in at 7:10am thanks to Espana traffic. Why did I forget to factor in morning rush? (The quick answer to that is I am never human before 9am so I forgot how the morning looks like)

Thankfully, the flag ceremony was extended and it seemed as if I was not late at all. I did make it to my classes and taught well. I think that’s a miracle. I was late and was not late. Phew.


I am a zombie. I think this is what the characters from walking dead feel like. Or those in plants vs zombies.


February 14. Tuesday.


I refuse to be late! And yey, I have an assistant. Happiness.


Everywhere I looked, there were flowers and gag-inducing items in school, on the street, in the place where we had breakfast. As early as the flag ceremony, everyone was greeting everyone else a sappy, erm, happy valentines; it was even the topic over the flag ceremony. What’s the big deal?

As far as spreading the love was concerned, I don’t think I could do that in two of my classes. Que horror! Those barbarians! Sure, they’re giddy and young but their behavior is beyond my understanding. They just won’t pay attention! In my first class, I had to be the teacher I never wanted to be: the homile kind. I hate sermons so early in the day but I could not help it! They demanded that I give them a lecture about proper behavior on top of the Respect curriculum. I was on a roll, so much that I missed my second class just so I could nag at them for being rowdy. I hate teachers who did that. Now I know how it felt.

To all my high school teachers who had to go through what I did, I am so sorry.


I can’t believe I missed one class. They were my favorite, too.


February 15. Wednesday.

There are 32 sections in the year level I teach. 32 sections. I was grateful for handling two top ten sections but I count it joy as well that I have two lower sections. Did I mention I teach four classes?

The two classes in between were my breather. These kids participated, had nice things to say, needed to be reprimanded only once (what, they’re kids), and turned in their homework. The first and last class… well, I don’t have much to say about them except, ‘LORD, GIVE ME GRACE AND MERCY!’

I thought about ‘class divisions.’ There is a reason why some classes are not treated equally. I don’t want to be the first to say it out loud.


February 21. Tuesday.


(I’m such a bad teacher)


February 28. Tuesday.


Not late. Completed classes. Still held a homile.


Hi, I have decided that I can never be a teacher. I am not made of patience. Not one bit.


March 6. Tuesday.


Waiting for the class to fill up.


Why is corporal punishment banned again?

I come from a family of teachers. My grandma was a teacher. My dad is a teacher. My aunt is a teacher. My brother is now a teacher. Half of my aunts and uncles were teachers. I don’t know what their methods are and I’m sure they have pretty grand ways of disciplining their students but I wonder if they ever get the urge to do a Voldemort on their rowdy students.

It would be nice to have a conference and exchange notes with them but I have decided that after this semester ends, I am done being the corny-ang-aga-aga-sermon-na-naman person that I have become. I’ll just be their friend off campus.


Been thinking of my grandmother lately. She taught high school journalism and her students loved her. They have nice things to say about her and her clothes. Years later, her students would speak fondly of her, thinking about the many time she has dazzled them with her wit, outfits, and non-repetitive shoes (they have a count of her many different footwear).

I wish I were something like my grandmother. In upholding her legacy as a teacher, I resolve never to wear the same pair of shoes twice. She was fabulous like that.


March 13. Tuesday.


They’re on to us! They know how to get to us. Is it because summer break is in the air that their attention span has dwindled to almost non -existent? Even my favorite classes were too giddy to be attentive. What is the world coming to?

I didn’t realize it but the next thing I knew, I was prattling about in straight english (which meant I was really, really, really annoyed) and I knew they weren’t listening but I couldn’t stop. I was half-willing myself to just let it go, be the fun teacher who was too cool to care but I COULDN’T. I was teaching about respect and none of the lessons stuck.

I wondered if I were like that when I was in high school. I couldn’t remember. But I did tell them I did well in school and that I didn’t understand the difficulty of complying with an assignment that had to be passed one week later. I hated myself for saying that. I wish I could rewind and say something nicer.

I only had to handle two classes today. My partner and I split up so we can manage the four classes for an hour each. I knew spending more than fifteen minutes with this lot was going to make me lame. I resolve to be better next week.


March 20, 2012. Tuesday.


Ten minutes before we start classes at RMHS. I wonder how today will turn out now that we have an hour for each class. It’s almost summer break and the kids probably have ‘vacation’ stamped on their foreheads that they can’t think of anything else.

I can totally relate on how it’s like. I got vacation written in my veins already. It’s a bad thing for me. Bad, bad teacher. Game face on.


I totally had fun in my classes today! It’s a miracle. 🙂

How could I have forgotten that I could actually pray about how my day would turn out? I asked God to tame me, tame the kids and make our last days worthwhile. It went super fine. I didn’t do a sermon even when sometimes, the kids got too noisy. I was noisy with them. We played and shared ideas and genuinely had an awesome interaction.

That was until my last class, with 20 minutes to spare. They just started ignoring me. We were in a circle as there were only 15 students (out of 48!) so I decided to be a bit informal. They liked it too much that after I was done with the lecture, they stopped caring I was there. So I made them finish the activity sheets individually and had them return to their seats. I required absolute silence and gave them a stern look at the slightest sound. Ugh. Why did they have to make me lame like that.

I liked our first half-hour, we were having so much fun. One more day to go then I can be cool again.